Those couples who have been together for a long time know that the small characteristics we once found endearing can become irritating. Boss and coworker, and peer relationships, have the same type of relationship woes. All relationships start with some excitement, a little anxiety, and certainly some hope. We usually work hard at learning about the other person, listening to what they have to say, asking them questions, and trying to include them in important matters. We all seem to have a little unease when we meet someone new. Will this person like me? What if they don’t? Similar fears arise when entering into a job interview, or when meeting a potential mate for the first time. Human nature indicates that we all want to be the chosen one. Boss and coworker relationships can take on many forms; some are like a parent and child relationship, some are distant, and some are very close. They all usually start off with similar feelings; the hope that the new employee will last a long time, that they will do a good and responsible job, that they will like their new position, and that they will get along with their new “siblings”. The boss is hoping this employee will be a good fit. But managing relationships is tough! Figuring out what is underneath the beliefs, skills, and talents of this new person may be what it will take to keep them in the relationship long term. I think during the tech age we now live in, we need to consciously work to include the human aspect of relationship building and bring it back to the forefront of life and work. Figuring out what is important to us and the people we care about should be a priority. Asking someone out on a date, or offering them a job, should be done in person or over the phone, rather than via text. We should use common sense when developing a relationship and remember that it’s important to feel the humility that comes with being human. Maintaining relationships takes hard work, regardless of what that relationship is. Understanding where emotions are coming from, and why some people fight, some regress, and others just pick up and leave, will help in continuing on. Each person is unique; therefore, every relationship is different. Asking lots of questions whenever possible and sometimes just taking a deep breath and a step back may be all that is needed to get through a tough relationship. Sometimes, when the work becomes too difficult and exhausting for both parties, it is just time to go. But, the long term relationships, the ones that stand the test of time, through the booms and the busts, the layoffs and the promotions, the pregnancies and the deaths, well those are the ones that count at the end of the day!
-- Sharlene Massie is the C.E.O. of About Staffing Ltd., a dynamic personnel agency specializing in direct-hire and temporary placements. Questions for Sharlene? Visit the About Staffing website at www.aboutstaffing.com, and click on the link under the Sun logo. This article may be reproduced or transmitted if done so in its entirety, including this copyright line: Copyright 2009, by About Staffing Ltd., all rights reserve.
